Diary: Day 25

I don't know what to say besides the fact that I feel like I have two voices in my head. One of humble reality keeping me grounded to the realness on how much I remember how much it sucks when I push myself to exhaustion so late at night knowing that i have to wake up at 530am every morning. The second voice that pulls me away and commands my actions like a spiritual entity that knows what my mission is to the point where I flow through the motions and begin even when my body is crying for me to stop. It's like there is this ignition inside me that when the flame is amber glow and struggling to stay bright that once the routine begins it begins and almost instantaneous nothing else matters but what is 10 feet in front of me. The push to move 10 feet so that I can go another 10 feet and another until the end. It's as if time is irrelevant and the voices all around me fade away including my own real voice which is the loudest of all. It's like being a machine where I am the passenger in my own body. Just thoughts from a rambling obsessive compulsive broken horse.